Get In on the Beginning of Hot, New 5-Part series with Trainwreck (Trainwreck #1) by Michele Micheal Rakes (guest interview, excerpt and giveaway)
Trainwreck (Trainwreck #1) by Michele Micheal Rakes
Release Date: January 25, 2016
Goodreads Link
Publisher: Michele Micheal Rakes
Cover Artist: Drai Bearwomyn
Cover Photography by Dan Skinner
Editing: Tina Adamski
Today Scattered Thoughts and Rogue Words is happy to have Michele Micheal “Mikey” Rakes, author of (Trainwreck, here today. Hi,Mikey, thank you for agreeing to this interview. Tell us a little about yourself, your background, and your current book.
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All my friends know me as Mikey, but I write under my full name so my mother can be proud of me. I’ve written other books for Loose Id: Saving Kane, Fourth and Long, and I’m working on the two follow up books for those stories. Trainwreck was written in six months toward the end of getting my degree in surgical technology, back in 2010. Took a while to get these guys out there for readers.
- Tell us about your book.
Trainwreck…
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Pride Promotions
In February, I will team up with Pride Promotions for a weeks long blog tour to introduce Detective Sergeant Vincent Sweetwater, the hero of Trainwreck the Series. January 25th, 2016 was the release day for the first in a five part series. Vince is a trainwreck. So is his life and sexuality. A true sexually sadistic killer may be the one who brings Vince off the tracks of self-destruction and back into a life of redemption.
Trainwreck Releases Monday
On Monday, January 25, 2016, the first book of a five part series will be released.
Detective Sergeant Vincent Sweetwater hates dead bodies. That’s why he’s an undercover narc and not a homicide dick. So why is he standing on a sandy beach in California staring at a lifeless body—oh yeah, the suicide attempt. Lieutenant Hanson is making a statement. Something about life worth living. Shows what he knows.
As Vince examines the tortured body, he feels an empathy and déjà vu for the victim, her wounds are similar to scars he has only a vague memory receiving. An intense desire to find her killer fills his queasy belly as a dark game of cat and mouse begins.
The young woman’s death forces Vince back into a secret life dominated by sex, perversion, and sadomasochism. Estranged from his wife he still loves and longing for the man who possessed him once, Vince buries his torment deep inside meaningless sex.
*Warning: This book contains adult content and situations. NOT FOR THE SQUEAMISH.
Trainwreck: Where no one is left unfucked.
*Special thanks to Scott Burkett and Denise Shirley Carter and Meg Amor. They know why. Tina Adamski, Dan Skinner, Drai Bearwomyn, Evie Camacho, Elizabeth Sa`Fleur, Spencer Dryden, Ian Smith, Daily Hollow, everyone at ERWA, and so many more.
Releasing Soon: Book One of Trainwreck.
Chapter One
Vincent Sweetwater twisted the Harley’s throttle. The power in the motor thrummed between his legs. The bike seemed heavy, angry; like she wanted to fall flat on her face. Like she yearned to drag him across the gritty asphalt. Vince needed to feel the pavement shred his clothing and bite into his skin. Punishment for being a man who thrived on suffering.
Why can’t I control myself, damn it?
-You’re supposed to be one of the good guys.
Fuck off.
-Stop drinking, Sweetwater.
Vince envisioned choking the life out of his conscience. The damn thing made it difficult to be an asshole, yet somehow he didn’t let it stop him. Nothing stopped him from being a dick to his wife. Vince squeezed the throttle. The speed would numb his mind.
The machine growled beneath him, giving her two fucking cents, and he ignored the wanton slut. Vince was too malicious to give her what she craved. If he did, there would be no turning back.
Still, the iron bitch demanded more power. Urged by a quiet whisper from somewhere in the darkness of his mind, Vince let off the throttle long enough to grasp the clutch and toe it into sixth. Then there was nothing but speed, wind, and emptiness. The night enveloped him as he rode beyond the limits of his headlights. The asphalt was a grainy blur.
The ocean whispered to him as the highway snaked along the coast, high up on the bluff. Waves were a distant rush below the edge and he considered leaning to the right; to take the dive he knew he deserved. Instead, he kept his eyes on the road, glancing at the speedometer only out of curiosity. He no longer cared what laws he was breaking.
The bike responded with a throaty purr. No longer angry. She loved him as long as he gave her what she craved. Like a lover, she read his mind and reacted to the slightest twitch of his muscles. In a strange way, she was a part of him. Together they were a fusion of flesh and machine. Vince couldn’t think of a better way to die.
The road rumbled beneath the wheels, relentless and vindictive, waiting for the moment he made his fatal mistake. Vince pushed the Harley’s limits, but the machine had none. She caved to his need. He’d have to rein her in if he didn’t want to die. The machine didn’t care. Neither did Vince. Not anymore. So they both sped into the night, too chickenshit to stop. Mica deserved his blood. God, he owed his wife so much more than his death.
“Christ, I shouldn’t have hurt her,” he whispered. Vince tasted his own bitterness; smelled the tequila on his breath, trapped inside the black full-face helmet.
Is this what my death will taste like—tequila?
The drink made him mean. Just like his dad. Like his grandfather. Vince knew he should have left Mica long ago. If he were a good man, he would’ve saved her from this vicious cycle of drunken abuse.
Memories swirled in his head, buffeted by the events of the evening and the pain he’d inflicted on his wife. Vince wouldn’t allow excuses; yet so many things were beyond his control. Past horrors infected his life—horrors Mica never suspected. Most of them he managed to forget. Only the vague sense of a smudged soul remained as every tragedy he suffered lingered inside his skull.
His world was falling apart; unraveling beneath him, like this endless highway. Vince imagined the road was waiting for him to trip over the edge. A dark maw ready to swallow him whole or snap him into little pieces to grind and chew.
Vince squeezed the throttle. Like his father, he fueled his dark side, and let it run rampant rather than exert any self-control. Spoon-fed on pain, Vince encouraged his dark side to grow strong as an adult, even as his life crumbled around him.
Fine work, Sweetwater, why don’t you just stand in Daddy’s fucking shadow? Sit in prison with the old man? Have some father-son time.
Christ, I’m an idiot! Mica’ll be happier in the morning when they scrape my body off the pavement. She’ll have closure. What a stupid word, closure, it’s a shrink’s word. Fuck, they can’t fix me. I can’t fix me.
The death grip he had on the throttle thrust him headlong into the black. There would be no moment of correction. No saving himself if something went wrong. It was only a matter of time. Vince anticipated the moment. Hell, the thought of it made him half-hard. The mechanism of all his evil twitched to life at the idea of his own pain, tightening his jeans. Why was he so sick? Why’d the pain turn him on?
Vince replayed the events of the evening over again in his mind. His own form of self-flagellation. He was merciless. The agony was in spoiling the woman he loved. Mica was the only person he had left who loved him. The woman he had endured so much to protect over the years was now damaged by his own hand? How could he let this happen?
None of it was her fault. Yet, knowing that never stopped him from being cruel. Even when it killed him inside to be so ruthless. Since their daughter’s death he had become the monster he feared. The monster that haunted his nightmares. Vince knew it was time to put an end to everyone’s suffering.
Will I see my little girl again?
Headlights glittered from around a curve in the highway. Opportunity materialized in those yellow orbs. Vince leaned toward the center line. The bike tried to stand up, but Vince muscled it back onto its horrifying track. The feeling was unnatural. His body wanted to lean away from the oncoming car; to save itself, but his mind fought the urge. The bike drifted into the opposing lane. The Harley cleared the front end of the passing car as it veered to avoid the collision. Vince’s chest burned with sudden relief. His heart stuttered a few anxious beats.
In the darkness, he didn’t see the trailer until it careened wildly in his direction. The Harley clipped the trailer and corkscrewed violently. The impact ripped the handlebars from Vince’s grasp. The bar snapped back to shatter his hand and he clutched his wrist to his chest. He hit the pavement as the bike continued it’s spiral. There was a sickening snap in his lower leg as the slide began.
To Vince it was like watching a movie in slow motion. The sound in his ears seemed hollow and far away. The metal and asphalt snarled at each other like dogs fighting. The bike kicked up to tumble over him once more as his body rag-dolled out of control, wrenching his hip. The only thing he saw was the arc of his headlights, like a sick beacon in the dark, when the bike sailed over his head. Then the rear tire slammed into his helmet.
Daddy?
The room was dark. Silent. Vince held his breath. His hip ached. The sheets were soaked. His fists knotted the fabric as his hand spasmed. Was it the dream that woke him or something else? For a moment, he listened to the silence, straining to hear a sound. When none came, he released his breath and moved disjointedly to sit on the edge of the bed. His T-shirt clung to him. Vince yanked it over his head and tossed it on the floor, adding to the growing pile.
“Damn it! Give me a fucking break.” Vince blew out a shaky breath. When would he stop dreaming about the wreck? It was bad enough he survived. Worse yet, he was restarting his life in the morning, returning to work after way too long.
“Jesus, I need some sleep.”
Nearly two years of hospitalization and rehab repaired his physique, but not his psyche. The shrink talked about survivor’s guilt, grief, and self-deprecation. Terms like self-hatred and self-harm were thrown around so freely he was afraid he wouldn’t be cleared to return to work. Hell, work was all he had left. Vince had to convince his shrink it had been an accident. Not an attempt at suicide. Not a well thought out attempt, anyway.
-You’re so not ready.
Vince squashed the little voice in his head. “Need to fucking piss.”
The bathroom light cast an inviting glow. Vince rubbed his leg. The fracture had healed, but it still ached. Standing stiffly, he crossed the room with his peculiar gait. The side effect of a shattered hip and a broken leg. Not gimpy, just odd.
After flushing the toilet, Vince glanced around the pink bathroom. The bathtub was still full of toys. Barbie dolls with matted hair and Bumblebee in a state of half-transformation. He tried to bend down to pick up the toy, but he was too sore. Vince had overworked himself with the Nautilus earlier in the day. His partner and foster brother, Nick had accused him of reinjuring himself. The bastard was looking for any reason to keep him sidelined.
Vince turned to the sink to splash cool water on his face. Stopped short by the little carved bar of soap in the dish, he heaved a withering sigh. With a shaky finger he traced the delicate dolphin he had carved for his little girl.
“Maybe it was bad idea sleeping in your room, baby girl. For a split second, I thought I’d heard you.”
Daddy?
“Dead voices can’t be good, Sweetwater.” He leaned closer to the mirror, trying to find a semblance of the human being he once knew, instead of the shattered shell he hated.
“Jesus, what’re you doing to yourself, man?”
Vince spoke to the desolate visage in the mirror. The one staring out from under shoulder-length hair the color of dirty straw, unwashed and stringy, with haggard green eyes full of pain. Pale stubble covered his jaw. He had his father’s high Indian cheekbones. Soft, full lips compressed flat in disappointment as he shook his head and pushed from the counter to return to the drenched bed.
“Okay, one more night almost down. Way too many to go. You really should stop talking to yourself, man. Doesn’t help the psych evals any.”
A bottle of vodka said hello from the nightstand. Who the hell was he to deny such a sweet invitation? He snatched up one of his bottles of narcotics. The rattle soothed his soul. Alcohol and pills were such beautiful companions. They were a difficult duo to deny, and even harder to get. The docs were getting stingy.
“Don’t want the vodka to be lonely.”
Not lonely like you.
“Shut the fuck up, Jiminy Cricket.”
Or you’ll do what?
“I hate you.”
There you go with the self-hatred again, what would your shrink say?
“Karen can fuck off, along with you.”
Not counting the pills as they fell into his hand, Vince tossed them back, hoping to kill the voice in his head. He sat for a long, dark moment. Gone somewhere inside his own head. He shivered and took another drink.
Vince grabbed the remote and clicked on the news. He paid little attention as he rubbed his aching hip. When Lola Romero began her news report he glanced up to see an official photo of himself in uniform.
“Jesus, talk about an old fucking picture.”
Despite being only twenty-three in the photo, he hadn’t appeared young and fresh faced. His eyes had held a kind of darkness even then, and his best efforts were unable to hide the pain.
“An L.A.P.D. Information officer confirmed the return to duty of Detective Vincent Sweetwater just one week after a horrifying display of violence toward a man who was reportedly beating his five-year-old son in the parking lot of a Home Depot in Inglewood. Detective Sweetwater was nearly killed last year in a motorcycle accident on the Pacific Coast Highway and is still under scrutiny following alleged misconduct while under deep cover with the narcotics division.”
“Bite me, Lola.” Vince shut off the TV, flopping back on the bed, staring into the darkness.
“Fuck my life. It was more than a year ago. Bitch.”
I hate people.
Three-Way Weekend Release Day!
I loved this story and I think it is worth the read. Been brow beating the author for a sequel already. Love Theophilia’s work.
Trigger Warning: Life happens
This is an amazing post about trigger warnings and hits that nail right on the head!
What we mean by the term “rape culture”
I’ve recently been watching a Netflix series called Hemlock Grove, and while there are several moments in it that make me cringe and wonder if I really want to subject myself to it, one in particular stands out. The next paragraph is a spoiler, for anyone who hasn’t watched it yet.
It’s a scene in which Roman—one of the two viewpoint characters—is devastated about his best friend and cousin having sex, so he goes to find a girl who propositioned him earlier. They start to have sex, but he then insists upon tying her up. She’s been having a good time, and she goes along with that. Then he gets more aggressive, manhandling her and yelling at her to tell him he’s “ugly” (because Roman has issues). She becomes frightened and struggles to free herself, begging him to stop while he hammers into her. Then, when it’s over, he…
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Book Review: Saving Kane by Michele Michael Rakes
A new review for Saving Kane! Just on cusp of its one year anniversary and pending release on audible, amazon, and itunes!
Reviewed by JustJen
Title: Saving Kane
Author: Michele Michael Rakes
Heroes: Kane Abel/Garrett Young
Genre: MM Contemporary
Length: 235 Pages
Publisher:Loose Id
Release Date: August 12, 2014
Available at: Amazon and Barnes & Noble
Add it to your shelf:Goodreads
Blurb: A twenty-something paramedic suffering from PTSD and a failing relationship with his high school sweetheart becomes embroiled in the tragic life of a young, gay man brutally beaten, raped, and left for dead.
Kane Abel can’t help falling for his caregiver, the handsome paramedic who saves his life, but he’s resistant. The one time Kane threw caution to the wind, he was left with a wired jaw and a tracheostomy. He can’t take much more hurt. But with his attacker’s promise to return, Kane lives in a constant state of fear, and with the ever-present paramedic, arousal.
Garrett Young struggles with the question of his sexuality, unable to…
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Three-Way Weekend Cover Reveal
I love this story and recommend it for a sexy read!
Saving Kane by Michele M. Rakes #LGBT #Review
Wow, thanks Sam! A great review.
Sam reviews ‘Saving Kane by Michele M. Rakes’. Published by Loose Id LLC on August 12, 2014 and is 260 pages.
This book was provided free of charge by the author for an honest review.
Why I read this book: I loved the cover and after reading the synopsis I knew it was a book I would have to read.
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CLICK ON IMAGE TO BUY
Synopsis:
A twenty-something paramedic suffering from PTSD and a failing relationship with his high school sweetheart becomes embroiled in the tragic life of a young, gay man brutally beaten, raped, and left for dead.
Kane Abel can’t help falling for his caregiver, the handsome paramedic who saves his life, but he’s resistant. The one time Kane threw caution to the wind, he was left with a wired jaw and a tracheostomy. He can’t take much more hurt. But with his attacker’s promise to return, Kane…
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Michele M. Rakes’ Fourth and Long Blog Tour: Character Interview
acks, why did you not tell anyone what was going on when you were a kid?
The one time I told someone, they didn’t believe me, so best to keep my mouth shut. A word of a ten year old doesn’t hold as much weight as a man of Phelps stature.
What’s different now?
Jared and Irus. They need me to stand up to the bogeyman of my past. It’s time for me to stop being afraid of what people will say or what will happen to my career. The kids of my charity deserve someone strong to care for them. It’s gotta be me. Irus made me see that and I’ll never be able to adequately thank the man for the strength he gives me.
Do you feel you missed out on childhood?
Hell, I missed out on life. I cut myself off from all meaningful relationships. My life…
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Welcome Michele Micheal Rakes
I’m discussing my writing process over at Drops of Ink.
I’m hosting Michele Micheal Rakes today on my LJ as part of her Creative Minds tour with Dani CM for her new release Fourth and Long.
Guest Post and Giveaway: The Fourth and Long Blog Tour With Michele Michael Rakes
Welcome to Michele Michael Rakes today on the Fourth and Long blog tour. Michele chats a bit about the book, how it came to be, and is also giving readers the chance to win some great prizes, including an e-book set of Saving Kane and Fourth and Long to two winners, or a $15 Gift Card grand prize.
Good luck!
How Fourth and Long came to be…
Football is about passion, teamwork, and athleticism. The game is adrenaline inducing and rooting for your team is a year round experience. These athletes are the new gladiators. Football players epitomize the ultra-masculine ideal. Yet, there is always controversy. Trades abound. Players shake up the game with powerful personalities. There is sex appeal. Hard bodies. Just check out the football players in the yearly body issue of Sports Illustrated.
To this fan, their skills are sexy, and even a little homoerotic. All that…
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GIVEAWAY & R-rated EXCERPT: Fourth and Long by Michele M. Rakes
Check out Because Two Men Are Better Than One. Hosting Fourth and Long on the third blog tour stop.
Blurb
Irus Beaumont, cornerback for the Highlanders, has an issue with his nemesis: wideout for the Pirates, Jackson McCoy. Partly jealous over Jackson’s skill and ability to scrub coverage, Irus also struggles against an unbearable attraction to the receiver. Firmly ensconced in the closet, Irus also has a no football player rule, leaving his desires for Jackson unfulfilled. Anti-gay sentiment in the league keeps Irus closeted, even though he’d rather be out and proud.
When Jackson McCoy suffers a gay bashing at the hands of his team mates after winning the national championship, he finds himself traded to the Highlanders. Spring training brings out Jackson’s competitive nature, eliciting the aggression of his new team’s cornerback, Irus Beaumont.
In practice, Irus hurts Jackson badly. The injury places Jackson on the reserve roster. Jacks has plenty of time to contemplate his life, career, and his attraction to the sexy cornerback. Off to…
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INTERVIEW: Stay With Me by A.L. Lamb
Ms. Lily’s first of many publications to come. Congrats! It’s a lovely story.
Today we’ve been joined by our good friend Lily who is celebrating the release of her first story. She has kindly provided us with an interview.
Blurb
It has been weeks since Curtis first saw the young waiter with the haunted eyes. No matter how often he went to the café watching him and to find the right opportunity to introduce himself, that moment simply did not come. Joseph was aware of the gentle giant who quietly came to have his lunch and then left. Fearing his father’s wrath and under his ever watchful eyes, he made no moves nor overtures. Until one day…
Interview
Congratulations on the release of your first book! I know what a wonderful and terrifying journey it is. I was hoping you could share a little of your experience with your new fans.
Firstly the cover. The cover, with its pretty Frangipani’s is eye catching…
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MicheleRakes wants to share this story
Bec- EXCLUSIVE COLOR REVEAL: Fourth and Long by @MicheleRakes (Michele Michael Rakes):
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Watch “MJ The Thunder Rolls Live Cover” on YouTube
MJ The Thunder Rolls Live Cover: http://youtu.be/jMoqazZQVmA
Watch “MJ The Real You” on YouTube
MJ The Real You: http://youtu.be/GxgFati-6Y0
Watch “MJ Street Lights” on YouTube
MJ Street Lights: http://youtu.be/vtnTitUF9z8
Watch “MJ Mind Of Music” on YouTube
MJ Mind Of Music: http://youtu.be/VnXC6iMwm2Q
Michele Micheal Rakes Author Page
https://m.facebook.com/michelemichealrakes
Check out updates on projects such as Trainwreck, Ephemeral Darkness, and Fourth and Long.
Check out @DanSkinnerArt’s Tweet: https://twitter.com/DanSkinnerArt/status/546417222202044416?s=09
MicheleRakes wants to share this story
Michele Micheal Rakes http://t.co/8r3rg1rdJg
Come take a look at what I’m working on now at my Facebook author page. http://t.co/eIbAqBbBne
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